Cross-generation fight over a job
- By Elaine Duan
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E-mail China.org.cn, March 21, 2012
But soon, Liu panicked after realizing she might not be able to see her son any more after the heated arguments between them.
Over the past month, Ran has persisted not to answer calls from his mother. In an interview with the Chongqing Morning Paper, the young man said he has chosen to avoid his mother because their quarrels over the past three years have put him on the verge of a breakdown.
He has now taken on his fourth job after graduation and knows his mother is looking for him in Chongqing. "I send a text message to my sister but I dare not see my mother despite it being hard for me as well," he said.
Ran recalled that he and his mother were very close before his college graduation and he would call his parents every week to ask how they were doing.
"My mom hopes I find a job working for a state-owned enterprise, but I'd like to live life my own way, instead of living an ordinary life with a secure job," Ran said. He could hardly figure out why his mother cannot let him go.
At the very beginning, Ran tried to communicate with his mother. But with every argument, their conflict worsened and neither of them could be heard by the other.
"I felt unwilling to talk to my mom from 2010 onwards, when she sold my belongings in Chongqing," the son said.
"I regret selling his computer, clothes and blankets in order to force him to come home," his mother said.
Her intentions failed. She came to the company where the son worked, hoping his boss could help.
"She always caused a stir at my company each time she came to Chongqing," Ran said. "I cannot take much more of this, but she is my mother...So I can only put up with it when I choose to avoid her."
Ran then worked for a magazine with a promising future. He earned 5,000 yuan monthly and was planning on buying a home with a mortgage loan. According to him, he was gradually settling down in the city. But in the eyes of his mother, the job was not as secure as one in a state-owned enterprise. In the end, he was forced to give up the job.
According to Liu, Ran's girlfriend was another reason that her son was reluctant to return to his hometown. "I looked up the girl at her company and asked her to give up my son," the mother said. She admitted she crossed the line, but believed Ran would appreciate it once he realized the importance of a secure job
After that, Ran broke up with his girlfriend. "I am no longer able to live a normal life, but I hope she can have that chance," the young man said.
He turned off his mobile phone and moved to get away from his family.
But all this can't stop the arguments between them. Ran said he understood and appreciated his mother's love, but he is unable to take this anymore.
According to Ran, all roads lead to Rome, but "obviously my mother has a hard time understanding," he said. "I don't want to irritate her nor get into an argument with her every time we see each other."
When he saw her off at the Chongqing Station last time, she bit him. "I know she hates me," the son said.
"You look pathetic and I hate you." Liu will never forget what her son said after another livid discussion.
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