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Aged parents hit by post-holiday depression

Xinhua, March 7, 2015

• Many Chinese elderly are having a hard time as the Lunar New Year celebrations end and their grown-up children head back to work, leaving them once again alone.

  In a pair of tragedies reported last week, two elderly women in Nanjing, capital of east China's Jiangsu Province, committed suicide out of solitude and despair shortly after their children went back to their own homes following a week of family gatherings.

  Both women were widows and in their eighties.

  In a situation typical of the migrant labor economy in China, they lived alone for most of the year. The solitude became unbearable after a week of festivities and a short, teasing period of normal family life.

  Experts have said that elderly people, particularly the widowed, are vulnerable to separation anxiety and post-holiday blues.

  Zhang Chun, a specialist on psychological crisis intervention, said young people should visit or at least call their elderly parents more often.

  "The elderly feel depressed after the holiday, so we mustn't leave them alone," he said.

  "The cure to the old people's agony lies with their children," said Zhao Yueling, deputy chief of the Henan provincial institute of psychological health.

  "The elderly need family love and company more than anything else," she said.

  "Don't leave them alone for too long," Zhao said.

  Shi Guofa, 84, said he doesn't miss his son and three daughters.

  "They all live not too far from where I am," he said.

  Shi is a retiree from the agricultural science institute of Zhengzhou, capital of central China's Henan Province.

  "I don't want to keep the children at my side. They have jobs to do and families to care for," he said.

  But his wife, Shen Shuxiang, said Shi was lying about not missing the children.

  "At least a week before Lunar New Year's Eve, he had prepared the cash gifts for each of the grandchildren," said Shen, 78.

  "He was obviously looking forward to the annual family gathering."

  The elderly couple wasn't sure if any of their children or grandchildren would come for dinner, but they made 200 glutinous rice balls, the traditional snack for the Lantern Festival.

  The two of them together can eat no more than 10.

  "But what if all the children come for dinner?" Shen said.

  Li Tianrun, 82, who lives in Zhengzhou with his wife, said he knew no one was coming to see them for dinner.

  The couple has three sons and five daughters, but none of them lives in the same city.

  "They came home for the Lunar New Year, stayed for a week and left. They won't be back until next year," he said.

  Liu Shumei, 86, lived alone for many years after her husband died.

  Two years ago, she received heart surgery, after which she decided to live with her seven grown-up children in turn, staying with one family member for a month before moving to the next.

  "With children around, it's like family again. Otherwise it's just a house," she said.

  The well-being of empty-nesters has aroused widespread concern from lawmakers and advisers gathering in Beijing for China's annual legislative sessions.

  Many people have proposed improving empty-nesters' quality of life by raising special funds to provide for their needs and by designating a Seniors' Day public holiday, as an opportunity for their children and volunteers to keep empty-nesters company.

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