First you date. Then you get married. Then, you move in together.

Sorry, I'm not telling a love story: I'm talking about changes in higher education policy.

Chinese universities stopped disciplining students for dating about two decades ago. Five months ago, the Education Ministry lifted the ban preventing students marrying. And recently, they revised restrictions on students living outside of university dormitories.

"Universities should stipulate measures and strengthen administration on students who have to rent off-campus properties when the institutions have difficulty arranging accommodations," said a Ministry regulation released in late July.

Significantly, it dropped the clause "in principle, students should not be permitted to reside in non-university properties," which appeared in an earlier version released in June 2004.

Chinese college students have been required to live in cheap, crowded dorms with four to seven peers and observe stringent, almost synchronized, schedules for decades.

But there are problems with the alternative as well, of course. Last year's ban came as the media highlighted cases of criminals targeting the increasing number of students who chose to live off-campus.

Despite this, no doubt most young students received news of the regulation change joyfully. Those who wish to and can afford it can now start house-hunting before the new semester begins in September.

Parents and university administrations understandably reacted differently. They voiced concerns about security, and the threat of off-campus lifestyles getting out of control.

Their apprehension aside, the policy changes, together with previous ones on student dating and marriage, reflect the growing trend of deregulation in China's higher education administration. It is as if an old lady is reluctantly loosing her grip on her naughty growing-up children. It is a trend that should be encouraged.

The reasons are simple. First, the revisions represent a humanistic approach in administrating students.

Despite all the social expectations of them to concentrate on studying to become an educated elite, they are, above all, young adults.

If young people outside universities have the right and opportunities to enjoy romance, an earlier family life, or a freewheeling lifestyle, so should those inside the Ivory Tower.

Second, the step away from over-protection and over-regulation opens up many life choices to students. At the same time it enables them to form new social links. These skills are much needed to allow young adults to grow up independently and find their places in society.

In a society where parental and institutional overprotection and supervision has been omnipresent in most young people's upbringings, these steps are all the more necessary.

When they are children and adolescents, most students, being the only child in a family, are the focus of attention at home. The upshot of this is that many of life's challenges and decisions are taken care of by their parents.

When competition for quality education gets tough at all levels, expectations of their social roles in most cases narrow to simply being a "good student."

When only academic scores matter, other human qualities like character, and life and social skills, are neglected and left far from fully developed.

Higher education certainly opens new possibilities for the young to explore, but with supervision and safeguarding regulations prevalent, and parental financial support continuing to a large extent, their experiences of life, and chances of learning from mistakes, are limited.

Most of a student's activities and relationships are confined to within the campus walls. In recent years, because of this, internships and other ways of brushing up social skills have soared in popularity, as graduates face a tough job market.

The reality remains that some are not fully prepared to meet life's challenges and shoulder responsibilities when they graduate.

A recent survey published by Wenhui Daily reported that only one third of college graduate respondents said they could adjust to their work environment within a year's time.

Some are so afraid of life outside the Ivory Tower that they don't leave. The last two years have seen a record number of students sit postgraduate entrance exams.

Although universities should not be the only ones blamed, they cannot ignore their partial responsibility. Higher education is a vital period in a young person's transition to full adulthood.

To generate enough independent, responsible, (not only educated) youth for Chinese society to prosper, higher education regulators must get real. They must understand the challenges profound social changes present to young people. They should adjust their administration to remove the barriers to individuals' social and personal development.

By giving students the rights and opportunities to decide whether to live on or off campus, whether to marry or not marry, and even have children while still studying, universities are letting them learn their own valuable lessons.

With this in mind, the revisions are positive signals that things are getting better. They should be carried even further - by, for example, lifting all the rules on dorm living.

There might be crimes off-campus, but are there not crimes on campus? There may become more cases of co-habitation and perhaps pre-marital pregnancy and abortion, but shouldn't parents and educators be tolerant and allow the young adults to learn from their own lessons?

Transforming over-regulation does not mean hands-off governance. It's more like a new way of thinking.

Policy makers could unlock higher education's potential by removing regulatory constraints on universities. To date they have impeded many universities' ability to respond quickly to new opportunities and challenges.

And universities themselves could protect, sustain and direct student growth by providing more practical services. Student service associations, with housing information, sample contracts, security hotlines and personal development and career consultants are all norms in other countries' university systems.

Once these are freely on offer, it is up to the students to make their own decisions. And all we can wish them is "bon voyage."

(China Daily August 15, 2005)