Wisdom from China's greatest natural resource
- By Eugene Clark
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E-mail China.org.cn, February 2, 2014
When it came to happiness, the wisdom of the elders was that "happiness is a choice, not a condition." If you find yourself in a bad job, make the most of it until you find one that is better. One of the interviewees told a moving story of the loss of her daughter in a plane crash. She grieved non-stop for two years before she came to the realization that she had to go on living and be there for the others in her life. This did not mean she would forget her daughter who had died, but that she had to make a choice to be happy for those who were present in her life.
As to worry, even though these elders had been through war, depression and hard times, their advice was that we tend to worry too much; that worry does little good and worse, robs us of the present. To minimize worry they advised to choose your mate with extreme care and caution, to be honest and speak your heart. One of the biggest regrets, they reported, is when we wait too late to tell people that we love them, that we forgive them and ask for their forgiveness. For many, their biggest regrets were that they did not travel more, explore more, take up opportunities more. As Mark Twain wrote:
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
These elders stated that we should not worry about things we cannot control. We should be present in the moment and remember that the moments are all too few and pass by all too quickly.
America's wisest also said it helps to laugh and have a sense of humor. And speaking of humor it is apropos to again quote Mark Twain, one of the world's greatest humorists, who reminds us that: "One learns people through the heart, not the eyes or the intellect."
And, speaking of the heart, it is also important to be open to the magic and miracles of life. Mark Twain came into the world days after the arrival of Halley's Comet. He proclaimed throughout his life that he would go out the same way. True to his word, he died almost 75 years later on the day after Halley's Comet returned.
I do not know whether a similar study has been conducted in China. If not, it should be. Each of us should think about the great value and importance of the elderly people in our lives. We should talk to them frequently, phone or Skype them, learn and benefit from the wisdom they have gained and will so gladly share.
Remember it, record it, and pass it on.
The author is a columnist with China.org.cn. For more information please visit: http://www.china.org.cn/opinion/eugeneclark.htm
Opinion articles reflect the views of their authors, not necessarily those of China.org.cn
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